One businessman to another:"I finally taught my son the value of t he dollar. Now he wants his weekly allowance in EUROS"

One morning a man called a taxi company and complained that the cab he had ordered to take him to the airport had not arrived. The girl who took the call apologized, "I am very sorry the cab isn't there yet sir, but don't worry, the plane is always late." "Well, it certainly will be this morning," the caller said sharply, " I happen to be the pilot"

An archeologist is a man whose career lies in ruins.

Children are natural mimics. They act like their parents in spite of all our attempts to teach them good manners.

If you don't want your children to hear what you are saying, pretend you're talking to them.

The guys whose troubles are all behind him is probably a school bus driver.

Education is what you get from reading the small print in the contract. Experience on the other hand is what you get from not reading it.